lucius | you need him, i could be him.

[annabella acardia bletchley]

where is your boy tonight? i hope he is a gentleman.

she paced around the perimeter of the running fountain, her arms crossed over her chest and her blonde hair blowing slightly in the breeze. her mother's weekly letters always seemed to stress her out, yet in a way, they made up her mind for her. ever since the death of her second son, mrs. bletchley had become even more determined to saddle her remaining children into respectable marriages. annabella and mikayle continued to laugh at their darling mother's ambitions; her children were far too stubborn to let her control their futures. the woman had their best interest in mind, but anna couldn't help but to notice how things always seemed to work out the way she would have wanted them to, which was never less than perfection.

pausing, the blonde took a seat on the edge of the fountain and crossed her legs. though she wanted to, anna couldn't get her mother's letter out of her mind. "your father and i are happy for you, your father and i wouldn't have it any other way, your father and i are glowing with excitement for our children.." it was the same story her mother told their guests and pureblood society friends. mister and mrs. bletchley simply pretended like their second heir had never existed, and instead, focused on their other children and their marriages. more than anything, it made annabella want to shake her mother until she realized that losing a son wasn't something to hide and be ashamed of, and if there was anything the old, arrogant and proud woman could look up on, she still had one heir.

but for her youngest and only daughter, it wasn't good enough. having her mother breathe sighs of relief because she still held one remaining heir wasn't good enough; it didn't pay her brother the respect he deserved. however, annabella, still very much alive and capable, could do something about it. she could, and she would. that alone was enough to bring a small smile across her features.

[lucius malfoy]

Lucius spotted his... girlfriend. It did bother him a little to use that term.
"Hey, love" He greeted her with a smile as he sat down by the fountain next to her. He liked her, quite a lot, seeing some of his friends being less lucky had made him appreciate her much more lately. Because as far as arranged marriages stretched, Annabella Bletchley was a catch. He wouldn't call it love, what was love anyway? But he still hadn't met anyone he'd rather spend ages with. She was intelligent, and not only that, but somewhat sensible as well, to difference from a lot of the other girls that his parents could have matched him up with. And pretty too, "more like beautiful".

He made a mental note to thank his mum and dad, and considered himself lucky.
Lucius hadn't seen more love than occasionally some cheesy Gryffindors in the halls, his parents didn't show much more romance that expected from them, and they seemed quite happy anyway, at least far more successful than those cheesy kids' parents. The boy figured out that the best thing to do would be just playing along. And that was easy to say when he pretty much adored his fiancé.

It was always kind of awkward, hanging out with her alone. It was easy when there was other people around, then he focused on how it looked instead of bothering to think that much. But sitting next to her with no one to show off their perfect relationship for made him think about her. As his future wife. It made him feel uneasy, but still kind of... There was something inside him purring. And that of course made it even more awkward for him.

[annabella acardia bletchley]

where is your boy tonight? i hope he is a gentleman.

lucius malfoy was the perfect man. his hair was the perfect shade of blonde, and it hung around his perfect face and in his perfect eyes. every word that came out of his perfect mouth was perfectly spoken and elegant, yet she couldn't help but let her eyes rake over his perfectly toned body. this particular perfect man belonged to annabella, more or less. her fiance was perfect, yet she couldn't bring herself to love him. first of all, annabella bletchley didn't believe in love. she had never seen it, and was convinced she never would. love was overrated, yet she couldn't help but to dream about one day finding a man that would change her mind. as she looked up at lucius and watched as he took a seat beside her, the blonde bletchley couldn't help but to see everything her mother had ever wanted for her. an aristocratic, powerful, and wealthy man to tie her daughter to. one that would play the loving husband card and one that would forever represent the survival of her only daughter. lucius malfoy was exactly that, and her parents had known it when annabella turned a young age of five.

they had known each other for their entire childhood and had been betrothed for all of their teen years. they were expected to attend social parties together, and annabella was expected to wear her engagement ring when she was out in public. they were expected to marry eventually, and annabella was expected to save herself and her virginity until that day. which so far, she had. as he sat down, annabella leans back on her arms slightly, offering him a smile as a greeting. he was perfect in every sense, yet she couldn't bring herself to take their betrothal laying down. it would be wrong for her to follow her mother's orders like the other pureblood girls. she couldn't bring herself to do it, especially when lucius had been handed to her rather than chosen by herself. none the less, he was good to her and in return, she was kind and polite, and she respected him. but love? love was a crock of shit. crossing her legs, anna turned to look at him, the same polite smile playing on her features.

"afternoon, darling."

[lucius malfoy]

He still smiled.
His girl was gorgeous, he wasn't even going to try to keep his eyes off of her, not in the flattering sunlight. He found himself hoping that he had earned her. Annabella was a woman anyone would be proud of, she was wonderful, the kind of perfect that people wanted for real. Yeah, she would be desired as a hook up, but she was the dream girl for a serious relationship. Their relationship was too serious. Lucius hadn't earned her, and despite handfuls of arrogance, he couldn't quite get rid of that thing deep down in his mind. That pulsing feeling of not deserving her. 'fuck you, i'm malfoy., but the feeling was always there, he could feel its pressure against his cranium ever how he tried to mute it.

It was all business, Lucius had never expected it to be anything else, but lately, business appeared to have lost its value. It wasn't good enough any more. They were a couple, and compared to a lot of the other pure blood kids, their relationship definitely made it into a top five. But what ever their kisses looked like from a distance, Anna's lips were always rejecting. Lucius doubted that he'd ever be the one she tugged closer by own will when she was cold. And that didn't quite do it any more. Maybe being spoiled wasn't that good. He knew that he should be happy with what he had, respect and glimpses of appreciation. Now he wanted something he couldn't ask for, and he didn't like having to accept that.
It was downright sickening, actually.

He craved for something he already had, and feared that he would never get. Still looking at her he stated that yes, he should definitely be happy and satisfied, having that girl as his future should be enough to be thrilled about. He reached his hand out and picked up one of her soft blonde locks from the shoulder closest to him. "How's your day been?" He asked her while examining the strands of beautiful hair in his hand. Small talking wasn't anything he was particularly fond of, but he caught himself caring about how Annabella had it. About Annabella.

[annabella acardia bletchley]

where is your boy tonight? i hope he is a gentleman.

she smiled softly as he took one of her blonde curls between his fingers and examined it in the bright sunlight. he was good to her, far greater than he should have been. annabella didn't attempt to hide the fact that she didn't believe in love; she would simply tell anyone who asked her how she felt on the matter. lucius knew very well how she felt about love; about how she didn't believe that something so blissful could even exist. the thing that really made her respect him, aside from the fact that he was a malfoy, was that he still accepted her and treated her like a princess even when he knew her stance on love. however, in the pureblood society they dominated, love and marriage were two very separate things. annabella bletchley and lucius malfoy were arranged to be married, not arranged to be in love. however, the youngest and only daughter of miles and fran couldn't help but to wish she could force herself to believe; to give him what he deserved from a woman. perhaps she was taking someone else's place. some other woman that could love him in ways annabella couldn't even get herself to picture. in the back of her mind, she knew he could find a woman willing to love him with all of her heart.

and annabella didn't even know what love was.

however, whether she knew it or not, miss bletchley was far too territorial to ever consider letting another woman look at lucius like she knew they did when she wasn't around. he was her prize, and though she wasn't the best for him, she didn't want anyone else to have him. but above it all, possibly the worst part, was that annabella was extremely hypocritical. she hadn't learned to love lucius, yet she wanted him to love her. she wanted him to crave her and look at her like the woman of his dreams; she wanted him to desire her in every way possible and stay faithful to her, who couldn't give him the same in return. or perhaps she could, if she ever learned how.

annabella loathed small talk with a passion, but for lucius, she could make an exception. smoothly, she scooted along the bench slightly, bringing her body closer to his. she had grown used to his touch and certainly didn't have any objections. however, those questions she always found herself pondering burned strongly in her mind whenever she felt his skin or looked into his eyes. she wanted to know exactly how he felt with her. "ten minutes ago, i was wonderful. before i received an owl from my mother, that is." she sighed, rolling her eyes at the mention of fran and her dammed weekly letters. "i swear, the woman is dying to be a bride herself. it's only a matter of time before i shove her letters down her throat."

[lucius malfoy]

Lucius hated that kissing her would count as a waste of energy when no one saw. He'd considered it, being closer than enough when they were alone, but realizing that she only met his lips to be polite, correct, would be so much worse then. And he still was too proud to do that. He didn't want her to think, um know, that he was a fool for her. Lucius wasn't the sensitive, weepy kind of guy, he'd rather have his heartbreak to himself. "Heartbreak?" He thought, and let his thoughts wander. He interrupted himself at love, with a bitter face. Love wasn't anything the boy thought of himself as familiar with, but he was sure that love wasn't supposed to be that painful.

"Is it really that bad?" He asked Annabella. His voice was still calm and smooth, so far from what he felt like. It was so unfair. He wanted to scream, like he had done everytime he walked past the toy shop with his mother so many years ago, but he knew it wouldn't get him what he wanted any more. Why did Anna have it so much easier than him? Ever how much he liked her, Lucius couldn't bring himself to being happy for her.

It didn't work to tell himself that it'd be okay soon, that they'd graduate, marry and move in together, that he'd get used to it. Because he doubted that he'd ever get used to these feelings, that longing. Need.
She seemed to suck in a little bit more of his mind every time she filled her lungs with air, and it wasn't completely unthinkable that he'd be apathetic soon, if she kept swallowing his soul like this. Breathing out. It hurt him.